Category: relationships-family, marriage, parenting

Exploring the HEART of Grandparenting

This post discusses the significance of grandparenting and the impact it has on children’s well-being. In an interview, Dr. Aletha shared her ir experiences and insights as a grandparent, highlighting the role grandparents play in creating lasting memories and passing on traditions. Practical advice on caring for grandchildren is also provided, emphasizing safety and health.

updated September 2, 2024

Early in my blogging, I was grilled. Grilled as in “intense questioning or interrogation.”

And that’s not a bad thing, it was all in fun and I’m sharing it with you here. It’s about being a grandparent which we celebrate the second Sunday in September every year.

Grandma’s Briefs

Lisa Carpenter writes a blog called Grandma’s Briefs where she

shares my snippets, er, briefs on the good, bad, humorous, and heartwarming of being a grandmother, baby boomer, parent to adult children, wife, and writer.

One of the features on her blog is Grilled Grandmas, where she interviews other women who are both bloggers and grandmothers. Her blog challenges the stereotype of rocking chair grandmothers way past their prime in life.

a woman with her arms around 2 little girls on each side
Establishing a bond with grandparents is great for kids in many ways.
photo from Lightstock.com

Why talk about grandparenting?

Why would I talk about grandparenting on a medical blog? Health professionals consider the family a vital factor in health, both positive and negative. You probably know that family medical history contributes to physical health, but family interactions also play an important role in child development, learning, and emotional health.

Grandparents can play an important role in the lives of their grandchildren. In some families, they are the caregivers; in others, they help make lasting memories through special visits.

Grandparents pass on family traditions and give children the fundamental sense that they are loved and valued.

Research has shown that when grandparents are involved with their grandchildren, even from a distance, all the generations are often much happier.

Building Bonds with Your Grandchildren

My grilling

When Lisa “grilled” me, I had two grandchildren. Since then I have had two more. So now I have two boys and two girls. The older two live near me so I see them often. The younger two lives several hundred miles away.

Some of Lisa’s questions challenged me to answer. Some answers I knew right away, others required reflection. For example, this question

What is the most challenging part of being a grandma?

my answer-

Not having had a role model. My grandmothers died before I was born, so I never experienced having a grandmother in my life.

This question was easy.

What is one thing (or more) you’re proud to say you do right as a grandma?

We (including the grandpa) offer advice and help when asked, but we don’t butt in, interfere, criticize, or make demands. We let the parents be the parents.

Lisa asked me to submit a few photos of me with my grandkids; perusing my photos sparked many happy memories.

Lisa’s final question was –

What one bit of advice would you give a new grandma?

Learn the answer at Lisa’s post which you will find at this link-

Grilled Grandma: Grandma Aletha

The First-Time Grandmother’s Journal: Inspiring Prompts to Celebrate Your Experience with a New Grandchild

Lisa Carpenter wrote a book/journal about grandparenting. This beautiful guided grandmother’s journal will help you capture your thoughts, feelings, and memories as you embark on this thrilling, life-changing journey. (affiliate link, may earn a commission)

Read sample here

Taking Care of Your Grandchildren

Even though they are my grandchildren, I keep in mind that they are someone else’s children, even though the someone else is my child. I need to be mindful of their parenting plans and any special needs of the kids.

This article from Nemours Kids Health gives grandparents a refresher course in caring for children. Whether they are with you for just a few hours, several days, or live with you, this gives practical tips on keeping them healthy and safe when they are in your care. Here are some highlights.

It’s important to know a child’s medical history, including any allergies and any medicines your grandchild takes.

Always place infants younger than 1 year old on their backs to sleep to reduce their risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). Never put babies on their stomachs or their sides to sleep.

Babies and children should be in child safety seats that meet current standards. All kids younger than 12 years should ride in the back seat with the appropriate safety restraint.

See that your grandkids always wear a helmet when riding a tricycle or bicycle. Make sure that the helmet fits well. Be a positive role model (and protect your own head) by wearing your helmet too.

Supervision is always the best way to keep grandkids safe. But it’s also wise to childproof your home.

Washing hands well and often — particularly after going to the bathroom and before preparing or eating food — is one of the most important ways to prevent the spread of any illness, from the flu to stomach bugs.

Offer your grandkids a variety of free-time activities to try. Turn off devices and TVs during meals and homework, and set a good example by limiting your own screen time.

Learn CPR

If you don’t already know CPR, consider taking a class or refresher course. CPR is done differently in children than in adults. Infants and children are more likely to suffer respiratory arrest -quit breathing- than cardiac arrest-heart stopping. Common causes include choking, drowning, and trauma. Sources for training include

  • American Red Cross
  • American Heart Association
  • your local schools’ adult education programs
  • local hospitals and medical training programs

sharing the HEART of healthy grandparenting

I’d love for you to follow this blog and follow me on social media.

I share information and inspiration to help you transform challenges into opportunities for learning and growth.

Add your name to the subscribe box to be notified of new posts by email. Click the link to read the post and browse other content. It’s that simple. No spam.

I enjoy seeing who is new to Watercress Words. When you subscribe, I will visit your blog or website. Thanks and see you next time.

Dr. Grandma Aletha

cheesy-free faith-focused stock photos

Lightstock-quality photos and graphics site- here. 

(This is an affiliate link)

Hell and Back-a breast cancer story

Hell & Back is a memoir by pediatric ENT (ear, nose, throat) physician Tali Lando Aronoff, M.D. who finds her perfect life upended in ways she never imagined would happen to her.


The sorrows of death compassed me, and the pains of hell gat hold upon me: I found trouble and sorrow.


Psalm 116:3, KJV, public domain


Wife and mother

Just based on the title, you know this isn’t a happy story.

The main character, Tali, seems to have the perfect life. She is a pregnant young woman with a husband who adores her and two beautiful children. They have good jobs, a nice house, a nanny who is good with the kids. She has a loving and supportive extended family.

Then her father is diagnosed with an incurable brain tumor. She develops life threatening preeclampsia. She has an emergency caesarean section, delivering her baby prematurely.

Then she finds a lump in her breast. It is cancer- that has already spread.

Oh, did I tell you she is a physician with a busy surgical practice?

Hell & Back: Wife & Mother, Doctor & Patient, Dragon Slayer

by Tali Lando Aronoff, M.D.

Hell & Back is not a novel. It is a memoir by pediatric ENT (ear, nose, throat) physician Tali Lando Aronoff, M.D. who finds her perfect life upended in ways she never imagined would happen to her.

(By way of disclosure, I have never met Dr. Aronoff. After reading about her, I asked for a complimentary copy (PDF) of her book in exchange for a review. This blog post has affiliate links which will help fund this blog if a purchase is made. )

Doctor and patient

A physician’s illness can be awkward, both for us and for those who take care of us. Other doctors may assume we know more about our diseases than we do and fail to give us the same information they would give to “real” patients. We, on the other hand, often try to help them out by diagnosing ourselves, or minimizing our symptoms because we don’t want to bother them, or seem like complainers. Either approach impacts our care negatively.

But being a physician can be an advantage and it certainly was for Dr. Aronoff since she had friends who specialized in breast surgery, oncology (cancer), radiation therapy, and plastic surgery, all of which she would need. Recently out of training,  they had the most up to date knowledge in their fields. They helped her get to the right doctors, including getting appointments quickly.

But being a physician didn’t spare Dr. Aronoff pain from her mastectomy and the expanders (used to make room for eventual breast reconstruction). She still had to cope with  the debilitating side effects of chemo- fatigue, nausea,appetite loss, and hair loss- all the while caring for 3 small children.

A physician’s friends and family may assume that because we are healers, we are brave, strong, and can take care of ourselves. Dr. Aronoff found her closest friends understanding and supportive, and many went above and beyond, driving her to appointments, taking her kids to activities, and bringing meals.

“The naked truth”

When she lost her hair, she tried wearing wigs and found them uncomfortable so opted for scarves instead. This made her illness obvious, so when she went out in public people noticed her. She described becoming a “Synagogue Celebrity”, with people in her community posting sightings of her on Twitter because she “looked so good”.


“I smiled at praises..inside though, I was slipping, retreating into myself. But I didn’t dare let them see. With time and practice, I learned to navigate and embrace the dichotomy. I realized that projecting courage may not reveal the whole truth, but it’s not always a lie either.
Eventually, as the months passed, I regained my courage, I still had fight in me. So, I saved the naked truth for a handful of my trusted few.”

Daughter and doctor


Dr. Aronoff shared a poignant yet humorous moment celebrating Chanukah with her extended family while in the middle of chemotherapy that made her nauseated and weak.  She knew this would be the last time they would celebrate with her father, who had a terminal malignant brain tumor, so she made the 3 hour car trip to her parents’ home.


“In the glow of candlelight, I watched my father from the corner of my eye, burning his image onto my brain. I knew in my gut it would be the last year we’d celebrate together. We sang the ancient chant Hanerot Halalu about the miracle of the small jug of oil that burned for eight days. My family sure as hell needed some miracles these days too.”  

When the evening was over, they loaded the kids into the car for the long ride home.


“Alex (her husband) and I smiled at each other optimistically, anticipating a smooth ride back home with sleeping children. I hugged everyone goodbye and kissed my father lightly on the cheek. And just when I thought I was in the clear…(her daughter) Scarlett leaned over and vomited all over me!”


Who should read this book and why

Despite pieces of levity, this book is serious and hard hitting at times. Dr. Aronoff does not mince words, nor does she shy away from frank talk about intimate issues and raw emotions. If 4-letter words offend you, you may not want to read this book.

Dr. Aronoff’s book outlines the basics of diagnosis, staging, and treatment of breast cancer but I don’t think she intends it as a definitive patient guide. She does not imply that her experience is what other breast cancer patients should expect; rather she emphasizes that every patient’s journey may be different.

If you have had breast cancer, you may or may not identify with her experience. If you have not had cancer, her experience may motivate you to get a screening mammogram, explore your genetic risk, and consider what you can change in your lifestyle to decrease your  risk of getting breast cancer. (I’ll include some references for this at the end.)

“Dragon Slayer”

I won’t leave you hanging; this story has a happy ending. Dr. Aronoff is now disease free, and back working at her practice.She is a “survivor” but the threat of a recurrence will always loom over her. She may never know for sure if she is “cured”.

I invite you to visit her website to see photos of her before, during, and after treatment, and to read a sample chapter of her book.

Interlude-Women’s Cancer Stories

Dr. Eleonora Teplinsky talked to Dr. Aronoff for her podcast series Interlude. Listen to the interview at the above links.

Check out these breast cancer resources

Breast cancer screening

Understanding your breast cancer risk


Breast cancer is not exclusively a women’s disease, it happens to men also.

Risk factors for breast cancer in men

The Susan G. Komen Foundation offers this printable resource

Coping with a Breast Cancer Diagnosis


Informacion en espanol- Cáncer de mama

Shop To Fight Breast Cancer! Every Purchase Helps Give Free Hospital Mammograms To Women In Need!

Again thanks to Dr. Aronoff for giving me her book and sharing her story with all of us. I think we all have learned something that might help us or someone we know.

Dr. Aletha