Tag: caregiving

Redefining Retirement: Plan, Prepare, and Thrive

This post introduces a series about retirement, often viewed as ending one’s career, but it encompasses diverse experiences for each individual, such as new jobs, volunteer work, and personal pursuits like travel, hobbies or education. The series explores retirement preparation, identity shifts, and purposeful living.

What comes to your mind when you hear the word “retirement”? The word comes from the verb retire, which means “to go to sleep”. But most of us don’t plan to spend our retirement sleeping all day.

Most people think of retirement in terms of work. The dictionary definition is “to withdraw from one’s position or occupation; to conclude one’s working or professional career.”

But retirement is more complicated than that. I know people who retire from a career and start another which may be vastly different. Some people retire only to take a part-time job from boredom or financial necessity. Some retirees become so involved in volunteer work, they are busier than when they had a paying job.

Retirement can give you time to pursue a hobby or skill seriously, or to acquire advanced education. And who doesn’t look forward to traveling, visiting family, and exploring the world?

We may find ill health, disability, or advanced age makes working full-time or even part-time impossible. Sometimes unexpectedly, people find themselves assuming the role of caregiver in retirement, for a spouse, parent, child, or grandchild.

In other words, everyone’s retirement looks different; each is unique.

My friend Ric Shields invited me to be a guest on his DoorWays Ministry podcast series to talk about the questions that really matter when it comes to retirement.

Whether retirement is still years away, you’re getting ready for it, or you’re already a seasoned retiree, this series has something for you. We’ll explore how to plan, prepare, and thrive in whatever season of life you’re in.

  • How do you know when you’re ready to retire?
  • Can you actually afford to retire?
  • What happens to your sense of purpose and identity when work is no longer at the center of your life?
  • Where should you live, and what do you want to leave behind for the people you love?

The series also covers navigating family responsibilities, finding purpose in your next chapter, and protecting yourself and your family from the people who try to take advantage of older adults.

It’s about more than retirement. It’s about making the most of what comes next. Because getting older doesn’t mean your purpose is behind you.

You can access all the episodes at this link, and I will post them here on the blog and on Facebook. I hope you will share them widely.

In my episode, Ric and I discuss the HEART of purpose in retirement. It airs in two weeks.

Listen here as Ric introduces the series.

Prepare

Before you listen to any of the podcast episodes, take time to think about what retirement means to you now.

If you are already retired, how is it going? What do you like about it? What would you want to change?

If you aren’t retired, what thoughts or plans have you made about the future? What fears do you have? What goals do you have?

Keep these thoughts in mind as we walk through this series together. Remember, on this blog we find information and inspiration to learn, plan, prepare, and thrive through life’s challenges.

Exploring the HEART of Health

Thank you for reading this post. Please follow this blog and me on social media.

I share information and inspiration to help you transform challenges into opportunities for learning and growth.

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Dr. Aletha

7 tips to calm anxiety and worry

In 2025, with new health and economic challenges arising, such as measles outbreaks and trade wars, I revisit advice from the COVID-19 era to manage anxiety. Key strategies include limiting news consumption, naming fears, helping others, seeking support wisely, and prioritizing self-care to maintain mental well-being amidst ongoing concerns.

updated April 21, 2025

I originally wrote this post during the COVID-19 pandemic. Now in 2025 we have new but not necessarily less significant concerns.

Healthwise, measles has made a resurgence in humans. Bird flu, H5N1 flu virus, is rampant throughout animals and threatens to jump into humans.

The world is in an economic crisis due to tariffs and a trade war. And wars in the Middle East, Eastern Europe, and many other places threaten the safety and lives of millions.

So use this advice originally offered to manage pandemic anxiety to manage concerns about the world situation today. Because let’s face it, there will always be something to worry about.

The original 2020 post

Even physicians feel stressed and uneasy about the COVID-19 pandemic, maybe more so than others. We’re supposed to be the ones with the answers to our patients’ questions and have the means to help them.

One of my collagues read an article about dealing with this stress, and to decrease our stress from he shared it in an email, with some edits.

So I am sharing it here. I have added a few of my thoughts and some references, as well as a link to the original article from CNNhealth.

Limit the frequency of your updates, including social media  

With one of my patients, I suggested allowing herself one news check-in for 30 minutes each morning. 

Choose a frequency and a time that works for you.  But why stop there? 

Consider a social media sabbatical.   Give it a week and see how you feel. Taking the apps off your phone or tablet helps keep you accountable. 

diagram of the human brain.
The major parts of the brain, including the pineal gland, cerebellum, spinal cord, brain stem, pituitary gland, and cerebrum are labeled. photo courtesy of Source: National Cancer Institute Creator: Alan Hoofring (Illustrator)

Name your fears

Recognize that we all have a negativity bias hard-wired into our brains.  It’s a leftover evolutionary tool that helped keep our caveman and hunter-gatherer ancestors alive. 

Unfortunately, it overestimates the likelihood that something tragic will befall us, and underestimates our capacity and resources to cope. 

Conversely, if you minimize or ignore the threat of the pandemic, ask yourself if you should take it more seriously. If your reactions don’t match those of others in your community, your fear may have driven you to denial.

diverse people standing arm in arm

Think outside yourself: 

If/when you are feeling overly worried and anxious, and your thinking feels contracted and hopeless, turn your thoughts to how you can help someone else.

This may be a child or other family member, a group of society that is at risk or marginalized at this time, or some of the groups at higher risk due to their occupations, age, or medical conditions. 

When our thoughts turn to serving others, symptoms of worry, anxiety and depression lessen, and we feel better about ourselves. 

And this does not have to be anything big, simply shifting to focus off of ourselves and onto someone else helps.

a smiling woman working on a laptop computer
Physicians and counselors are available virtually, by phone or video visits.

Seek support, but do it wisely 

Don’t hesitate to ask for help if you need it.  And that goes for us caregivers too. 

We are not, and should not think of ourselves, as impervious to the various stressors, the disrupted routines and all of the uncertainty that is prevalent in the world right now.

Ask someone you can trust to be objective and rational, and not feed your worries or concerns. 

a basket filled with fruits and vegetables
a girl sitting in grass reading a book.
a simple bed, window shade down, small lamp on a side table
close up of walking down a road in sports shoes

Pay attention to your basic needs

Don’t get so wrapped up in thinking about the threats that you forget the essential, healthy practices that keep you physically well. 

  • Getting adequate sleep
  • Keeping up with proper nutrition
  • Getting outside as much as possible
  • Engaging in regular physical activity

Practicing mindfulness, meditation, yoga, and spiritual disciplines will  help center you in routines and awareness, and keep your mind from wandering into the dark and sometimes irrational unknown.

a women with hands clasped in prayer with a Bible

Don’t chastise yourself for worrying. 

Again, this is part of our normal programming.  And to help kids when they are scared, don’t just tell them everything is going to be alright. 

a man reading to two young girls, sitting in a woman's lap

Let them know you hear their concerns and that you understand where they are coming from.  And THEN give them evidence and reasoning for the opposite side of the worry equation.  

Acknowledge their fears, and validate them…  And then do the same for yourself.

This post was adapted from this article on CNNhealth

How to keep coronavirus fears from affecting your mental health

Thanks to my guest writer-Dane Treat, M.D.

Dr. Treat graduated from the University of Oklahoma medical school, although a couple of decades later than I did. He completed residency at Good Samaritan Family Practice in Phoenix, where he lives and practices now. He also completed a Sports Medicine fellowship. He is a student of Mindfulness-based Stress Reduction. He wisely married a Mayo Clinic trained gastroenterologist, and they are the proud parents of a daughter.

near Phoenix, at Scottsdale Arizona, The Boulders Resort; photo by Dr. Aletha
If you are depressed and thinking about or planning suicide, please stop and call this number now-988

988lifeline.org

SUICIDE AND CRISIS LIFELINE. CALL.TEXT.CHAT

Exploring the HEART of Health

Thank you for reading this post. Please follow this blog and me on social media.

I share information and inspiration to help you transform challenges into opportunities for learning and growth.

Add your name to the subscribe box to be notified of new posts by email. Click the link to read the post and browse other content. It’s that simple. No spam.

I enjoy seeing who is new to Watercress Words. When you subscribe, I will visit your blog or website. Thanks and see you next time.

Dr. Aletha