Category: Health

Observing Domestic Violence Awareness

October marks Domestic Violence Awareness Month, highlighting the need for awareness and action against domestic violence. It is vital to recognize signs of abuse and offer support to victims. Resources like the National Domestic Violence Hotline are crucial for safety and recovery. Community involvement and education play key roles in prevention efforts. Get educated and involved by reading and sharing this post.

If you know or suspect you are in a domestic violence situation, and this page is visible to your abuser right now, continue reading this post only if you can do so privately. If not, close the device and clear your browser.

Health issues are usually not the major concerns when it comes to elections, but they are related to the major issues, like the cost of living, taxes, and crime.

Among the major campaign issues are health-related concerns, including women’s reproductive care, gun violence, opioid addiction and deaths, mental health crises, and the cost of healthcare.

So it is appropriate that we highlight awareness of two major health issues, one I reviewed earlier this month and one in this post.

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship.

thehotline.org

A Day of Unity

First observed in October 1981 as a national “Day of Unity,” Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM) is held each October as a way to unite advocates across the nation in their efforts to end domestic violence.

Communities and advocacy organizations across the country connect with the public and one another throughout the month to raise awareness about the signs of abuse and ways to stop it, uplift survivor stories and provide additional resources to leaders and policymakers.

What is Domestic Violence?

Also called intimate partner violence, domestic abuse, or relationship abuse, It can happen to anyone at any point in a relationship. Domestic violence includes behaviors that physically harm, cause fear, prevent a partner from doing what they wish, or force them to behave in ways they do not want.

Domestic violence is a global problem. According to WHO, the World Health Organization,

  • Over a quarter of women aged 15–49 years have been subjected to physical and/or sexual violence by their intimate partner at least once in their lifetime.
  • The prevalence estimates of lifetime intimate partner violence range from 20% in the Western Pacific, 22% in high-income countries and Europe,25% in the WHO Regions of the Americas to over 30% in the WHO African region, Eastern Mediterranean Region, and the South-East Asia region.
  • Globally as many as 38% of all murders of women are committed by intimate partners and 6% of women report having been sexually assaulted by someone other than a partner, although data are more limited.
  • Intimate partner and sexual violence are mostly perpetrated by men against women.

(WHO info edited for length)

(Please note that PDF embeds will display on a computer, but most phone and tablet browsers won’t display embedded PDFs.)

2206-Hotline-postcard_digitalDownload

How to identify abuse

  • One feature shared by most abusive relationships is that the abusive partner tries to establish or gain power and control through many different methods at different moments. Examples include, but are not limited to
  • Telling you that you never do anything right.
  • Showing extreme jealousy of your friends or time spent away from them.
  • Preventing or discouraging you from spending time with others, particularly friends, family members, or peers.
  • Insulting, demeaning, or shaming you, especially in front of other people.
  • Preventing you from making your own decisions, including about working or attending school.
  • Controlling finances in the household without discussion, such as taking your money or refusing to provide money for necessary expenses.
  • Pressuring you to have sex or perform sexual acts you’re not comfortable with.
  • Pressuring you to use drugs or alcohol.
  • Intimidating you through threatening looks or actions.

What to do if you are in an abusive situation

The most immediate need is to ensure your safety and the safety of your children or other dependents.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline

The Hotline is a 501(c)(3) organization supported by grants from the Department of Health and Human Services and the Justice Department. Available 24/7 you can

Also search for Local Resources on the website.

The website has detailed instructions for creating a personal safety plan.

A safety plan is a personalized, practical plan to improve your safety while experiencing abuse, preparing to leave an abusive situation, or after you leave.

Abuse-is-never-okay_Hotline-Mirror-ClingDownload

How to help victims and survivors

Even after escaping an abusive situation, those affected need time and help to heal and move forward. If you are not a victim or survivor, you likely know someone who is, or will be. Here are suggestions on how to help.

Educate yourself about the forms of abuse and about your local resources to help victims.

Listen without judgment, be supportive of their decisions, be a trusted friend. Be willing to listen without giving advice unless requested. Don’t assume you would have acted differently in their situation.

Encourage professional support. There should be no stigma to seeking help from trained professionals, just like any other health condition.

Advocate for change in your community, support local resources, fundraisers, and education. Consider volunteering at a shelter. Support local officials who make domestic violence prevention a priority.

An easy way to help is to donate your old electronics like cell phones, laptops, and video game systems for resale.  The National Domestic Violence Hotline receives a portion of the funds furthering The Hotline’s programming and projects that support victims and survivors of domestic violence and the advocates and allies that support them.

Here is another shareable resource written with a faith-based perspective.

Faith-Based-Tip-Sheet-For-members-and-helpers_2024Download

Exploring the HEART of Health

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and share this post. By sharing this vital information, you may be saving someone’s life.

Please share in the comments your experiences helping domestic abuse victims or your own experience at surviving abuse, but only if you can do so safely without revealing personal information that might endanger someone’s safety.

I’d love for you to follow this blog. I share information and inspiration to help you transform challenges into opportunities for learning and growth.

Add your name to the subscribe box to be notified of new posts by email. Click the link to read the post and browse other content. It’s that simple. No spam.

I enjoy seeing who is new to Watercress Words. When you subscribe, I will visit your blog or website. Thanks and see you next time.

Dr. Aletha

Effective Strategies for Parenting Anxious Kids and Teens

In “Your Kid Did What?” Paula Lau discusses navigating parenting challenges. In this post I share her insights on anxiety, a normal part of life, especially for teens. Parents should engage in open conversations, share personal experiences, and allow children to face their fears to foster resilience.

In a recent post, I reviewed a new book, Your Kid Did What? by licensed counselor Paula Lau, LPC.

In the book subtitled “Strategies for Reclaiming Joy When Parenting Gets Tough” Paula revealed her anguish when faced with an unexpected life choice by her adult son. She shared how she used her Christian faith and training as a professional counselor to regain peace of mind and hope for the future.

Paula has been sharing parenting insights on Facebook and Instagram and she writes articles for local publications. I am sharing information from one of those articles with her permission in this post.

Paula Lau at a book signing

Adapted from The Anxiety Beast

by Paula M. Lau, LPC

It is not unusual to hear kids say they are “anxious” or “I have anxiety.” You may feel troubled when your child says this, but for most teens this has become a common part of their communication with one another and does not necessarily indicate a mental health diagnosis.

Adults tend to express anxiety by saying, “I am stressed.” All of us have been conditioned through television, social media, and other sources to think anxiety may be a symptom of mental illness that a medical professional must address.

Anxiety Can Be OK

We are trying desperately to avoid anxiety, but if you are alive, you are going to experience anxious feelings from time to time. We need to teach our children that feeling anxiety is okay and it is a normal part of the human condition.

Remember a movie about Gremlins, fictional creatures that grew exponentially in the right conditions?  Anxiety can be a Gremlin with a propensity to grow if fed the proper diet.

Anxiety for teens can express itself in different ways.

  • physical complaints, such as head or stomach ache.
  • trouble sleeping
  • avoidance of activities or people

This can all be NORMAL behavior especially during the teenage years.

Handling Anxiety

If your child is telling you they feel anxious, here are things you can do to help

Photo by Zen Chung on Pexels.com,
Explore the source  

A conversation with your child allows them to tell you why they are feeling anxious. Be careful not to say, “Oh, that’s nothing! When I was your age…etc.” Asking questions like, “Tell me more about how you are feeling” gives your young person the opportunity to open up about their anxieties and fears.

Share your story

Let them know that being anxious is NORMAL , then tell them about times you were nervous at their age and how you overcame that fear.

Help them face their fears

After you find out why they are feeling anxious, you can talk about facing their fears. Let your young person know that adversity (anxiety) can make you stronger as you face your fears.

Tell them you believe they are capable and competent. Fear is an opportunity for them to grow in new ways even though the experience may be uncomfortable for a season.

Desensitization

Is there a way to expose your child to what they fear in a modified format until they are more comfortable? For instance, if they are nervous about going to high school, call the school and tour the facility before the first day of school.

Finding a non-threatening way to expose your child to the things they fear can help them process their feelings.

Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com
Allow them to problem-solve

 Be careful not to helicopter in and fix stressful situations for your child. (There can be exceptions to this rule, but situations where you need to intervene are far less common.) Kids might see themselves as “broken’ and “not up to the task.”

Remember the teenage years (starting in middle school) are critically important when a young person begins to form their identity. They need to work out their problems with their friends, and teachers.

Your child will become competent as they sort their way through life and figure out what works and what doesn’t. That will require some anxiety on their behalf and yours!

Learning from anxiety

Parents must develop a tolerance for their child’s anxiety. We must let go so our children find their way in difficult circumstances. This can take amazing self-control, but our children benefit as they learn they can successfully face life challenges.

Paula’s book is also available at this link on Amazon.

Exploring the HEART of Health

I’d love for you to follow this blog. I share information and inspiration to help you transform challenges into opportunities for learning and growth.

Add your name to the subscribe box to be notified of new posts by email. Click the link to read the post and browse other content. It’s that simple. No spam.

I enjoy seeing who is new to Watercress Words. When you subscribe, I will visit your blog or website. Thanks and see you next time.

This post is not intended to diagnose or treat any mental or emotional disorder. Seek help from a mental health professional if you or your family have concerns about these issues.

Dr. Aletha