Throughout her book, Hot Holy Mess, Mary Katherine Backstrom uses weird and wonderful stories from her life to explain what she has learned about God’s grace, how it works in her life, and how that grace can work for all of us.
finding God in the details of this weird and wonderful life
by Mary Katherine Backstrom
note: This post uses affiliate links to sites that may pay a commission used to fund this blog. The photos used here are for illustration only and are not associated with the author or the book.
I read health and medical books for my own education and to review for this blog. Sometimes I choose something non-medical just for fun. So when I saw this book at the library, it seemed a good choice to escape the medical world for a few hours.
I became a little nervous on page 3 when the author mentioned in college she had dated a “shaggy-haired soccer player named Ian, who was premed” but I kept going. The next page she mentioned that he had “finished his training”. I was suspicious but kept reading.
Finally, the truth came out; this soccer player Ian guy grew up to be an emergency room physician and her husband. Next, she threw in CANCER and COVID. By then I realized I had picked another holy hot mess health book; there was no turning back.
MK’s weird and wonderful life
Although I’m well past her stage of life, I found Mary Katherine’s book funny, touching, and engaging. Mary Katherine, MK, had a rather ordinary upbringing, living with her single mother, two siblings, and pets, cheerleading in high school, then off to college ( which she didn’t take seriously). She fell in love, got married, had two children, and lived happily ever after.
Well, not quite happily ever after. That’s why she calls this book HOT HOLY MESS; that’s what her life has been like, and still is. She often (and still does) felt like an outsider.
But she always managed to find soulmates who accepted her for who she was. She also met Jesus who accepts her as she is and she wrote this book to tell us about Him.
A hot mess
When I picked up this book I assumed it was one of those books that she describes on page 210; those written by a
“woman who likes to poke fun at herself for her life being a hot mess. We find solidarity in owning up to our relatable rough edges. That’s why there are so many popular bloggers with mom buns and trashed out minivans. There’s a particular level of mess that plays well to the masses earning a badge of “realness”. God forbid your mess looks like a divorce, poverty, or severe depression.”
But, God
Mary Katherine hasn’t been divorced and she’s not in poverty although money was tight for her family after her father left. She admits to struggles with anxiety and depression as well as some other hot messes that I won’t spoil by revealing here. Mary Katherine is as real to her readers as she is to her God.
My edges aren’t neat. And I don’t exceed any standards: societal, biblical, otherwise. I’m an impatient parent. An imperfect spouse. An inconsistent churchgoer. I’m a crash dieting, emotionally fragile wreck, who spends as much money on therapy as tithing. I have a very hard time loving myself. All I see is a hot mess Mary Katherine.
But, God. He views me through a different lens entirely.
MK
Throughout her book, Holy Hot Mess, Mary Katherine Backstrom uses weird and wonderful stories from her life to explain what she has learned about God’s grace, how it works in her life, and how that grace can work for all of us.
I found her on Facebook at Mary Katherine Backstrom, where she promotes her books and shares her views on a lot of other stuff .
You may not agree with everything MK says on her page, or in her book, but she will entertain you and may challenge you to confront the holy hot messes in your own life, with the same honesty, courage, and surrender to what God wants to do in your life.
Her husband, Ian, has taken a “sabbatical” from clinical medicine, having lost the “joy of practicing”. I can relate, I have experienced that in my career. Medicine is a demanding profession, and sometimes the hardest demands come from within.
I’m going to follow along his journey, I hope he finds his way back to joy and satisfaction in the work he trained for. Here’s what he’s doing instead.
While I have beeen taking a sabbatical from clinical medicine, I have been spending a lot of time coaching at our local CrossFit gym. I know that fitness and CrossFit specifically sometimes get a bad rap as they are often associated with superficiality, body negativity, and unsafe movement.
In my experience this couldn’t be further from the truth. Fitness and specifically functional fitness (which CrossFit emphasizes) is medicine when delivered and practiced appropriately.
It rehabilitates our bodies, minds, and souls. It also allows for the discovery of deeper truths through the medium of competition and pushing the limits of our physical bodies.
Several months after writing this post I read on her Facebook page that Mary Backstrom and her husband Ian divorced. I am sad divorce has taken yet another marriage and children who deserve better. I offer my prayers for peace and healing to this family.
exploring the HEART of health in books
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Keith Wheeler embarked on a remarkable journey, walking over 26,000 miles and visiting more than 200 countries, carrying a 90-pound cross to share God’s love. Amid the COVID-19 pandemic and social unrest, he adapted, spreading hope through social media and in his community. Keith’s thought-provoking reflections and unwavering faith offer a unique perspective on current events.
Keith Wheeler-flying the Cross to the world
On February 10, 2020, Keith Wheeler left Tulsa Oklahoma for Tuvalu, a nation of Pacific islands just south of the equator. Lying halfway between Hawaii and Australia it is one of the most remote and least visited places on earth. But that is exactly the kind of place Keith likes to visit.
Keith on the airport runway in Tuvalu
For 37 years he has walked more than 26,000 miles, and visited every continent and over 200 countries for one reason- to love people and share God’s love, carrying a 90-pound cross over his shoulder. Keith uses the cross to get people’s attention and show how much God loves them.
But when Keith returned to the United States in March 2020, the world had changed. On March 12, 2020, the director of the World Health Organization declared the new COVID-19 infection a pandemic, and President Trump declared a national emergency for the United States. Travel, especially international travel, was curtailed drastically.
Keith would not leave the country again for almost a year, but he did not waste the time resting. He just changed the way he reached people. He continued walking in Oklahoma and nearby states and shared videos on his social media, writing
“Maybe some of those stories and the perspective gained can be an encouragement. I love the fact that even in these times of isolation we can stay connected through all our technology.”
Keith Wheeler
In three previous posts, I told you about my interview with Keith in December 2021 and my reflections from a sermon I heard from him in Tulsa in February 2022. In this post, I’m drawing from Keith’s social media posts and an interview with BURN podcaster Reese Black. (unfortunately, this recording is no longer available.)
(I have edited some of Keith’s statements for clarity and conciseness. I have added scripture references when he did not.)
March 28, 2020
Back home in Tulsa, Keith wrote,
“In the midst of all the fear, disruption, uncertainty, and confusion that’s going on in our world, we can be sure that our Father goes before us and walks together with us into the unknown.”
Churches were closed due to COVID. Keith was on the street to carry the cross in his own home city, Tulsa Oklahoma.
Keith carries the cross on Lewis Avenue, walking by the Praying Hands statue at Oral Roberts University in Tulsa Oklahoma
On that day he wrote on Facebook,
May the God of Hope deliver the gift of hope;
May the Prince of Peace guard hearts and minds with His perfect peace that passes all understanding;
May the Spirit of Comfort comfort & encourage hearts and
May the Savior of the World rescue and redeem lost and broken lives!
May 25, 2020
And then our country erupted into chaos, confusion, and confrontation.
Tulsa is a diverse city, with vibrant ethnic communities-Black, Latino, Vietnamese, Burmese, Muslim, Jewish, and many others. Our Native American community provides a link to its origin as a Creek settlement in Indian Territory.
The historic “council oak” at the site of the original Creek settlement that became Tulsa; photo by Dr. Aletha
Tulsa Oklahoma-Bible belt city
Tulsa is often referred to as the” buckle of the Bible belt”, due to Oral Roberts University and its many evangelical churches. Politically, Oklahoma is “red”, and conservative- the governor, both senators, and all five representatives are Republican. It’s usually a quiet, peaceful, almost boring place; but not in the spring of 2020.
I’m sure you have seen the video, shot by an onlooker- a Black man lay on the ground, handcuffed, a police officer kneeling on his neck. Despite pleas to let him up from people who witnessed it, he did not let go.
On Saturday, May 30,2020, hundreds of people protested peacefully on a march through midtown Tulsa. One protester was hit by a vehicle when the protest moved onto Interstate 44, briefly shutting it down.
Protests continued on May 31, when thousands gathered in the Greenwood District to demand police accountability and reform. In the evening, police officers blocked protesters from walking down Peoria Avenue and used tear gas to disperse the crowd. Reports of vandalism were made as rocks were thrown at cars and shop windows were broken.
downtown Tulsa, looking toward the Arkansas River in the background; the BOK CENTER is the Round silver structure on the far right; photo by Dr. Aletha
On May 31, a BLM (Black Lives Matter) rally was held in the Greenwood district, near Tulsa’s historic Black Wall Street. They were protesting because the Trump campaign had scheduled its first rally at the BOK Center in downtown Tulsa on June 19, known as Juneteenth, the day Black Americans celebrate Emancipation. (The campaign organizers subsequently changed the Trump rally to June 20 .)
another view of downtown Tulsa; the tallest tower, the BOK Tower, was designed by the architect who did the Twin Towers; photo by Dr. Aletha
Tulsa-“State Fair on steroids”
As Keith reported in the BURN interview, downtown Tulsa was like the “state fair on steroids.” He said there was a throng of people, some with bullhorns, protesting racism, masks, politics, pandemic restrictions. He noticed one man in particular, who he called a “troublemaker, stirring things up” by waving a Confederate flag. He said this “knucklehead” was “poking the bear, burning bridges.”
This is exactly the kind of place Keith likes to be, because “in a noisy world, Jesus is there.” As a peacemaker, Keith knew that’s where Jesus needed him.
another view of downtown featuring historic churches, L to R, Holy Family, 1st Christian, 1st Church of Christ, Scientist, 1st United Methodist, 1st Presbyterian, 1st Baptist; photo by Dr. Aletha
July 4, 2020, Independence Day
For the July 4 holiday, Keith posted this to his Facebook page
“Jesus came to give us liberty; not “rights”. When we choose to follow Jesus we choose to lay down our rights. In exchange, He gives us true freedom!”
‘Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”
Philippians 2:5-8 NASB
On July 22, 2020, Keith received a graphic reminder of the unrest of the spring-an unexpected but pleasant surprise
Look closely. Behind the man with the Confederate flag, is Keith, the cross, and the people he was praying for.
October 8, 2020 -from Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount
Keith wrote
In today’s world, it seems popular for those of us who claim to follow Jesus, to say “I believe the Bible…every word of it!” But do we really?! We’ve been given a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Jesus said,
“love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven…”
Instead, it seems that we have become proficient at accusing, blaming, criticizing, condemning, finger-pointing and mud-slinging our enemies. But BLESS them?! DO GOOD to them? PRAY for them?! LOVE them?!!!
Politics, race, masks, COVID-19, etc.?!. Let’s be salt! Let’s let our light shine! Let’s turn the other cheek! Let’s go the extra mile. (Matthew chapters 5-7)
May the Bible not just be a book that we say we agree with in our words, but may “the Word became flesh…” in our lives! (John 1:14)
At all times and in every way, may our words; may our actions; may our thoughts be a reflection of Jesus!
“By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” –
Jesus (John 13:35)
November 2, 2020
Keith ponders the upcoming presidential election between incumbent Donald Trump and challenger Joe Biden, one of the most contentious and controversial in history. Keith had some thoughts about that too.
“People often ask me as I travel around the world where I’m from…I tell them my passport says USA; the dust on my feet says the world; but my heart says the Kingdom of Heaven! I say this to let you know that I write this with as pure and humble heart that I can.
As we near the finish line in this historic race I have waited because far too many of us are already so divided. There’s enough strife and tension in our world today. My prayer is that I be a peacemaker. I don’t desire to be known for my political stand, but my identity as a follower of Jesus and my stand for His Kingdom!
It seems that everywhere I’ve been, anyone I’ve spoken with, on any form of media I hear fear, uncertainty, anxiety and concern about tomorrow’s elections. I understand. It’s easy to feel this way when we look at our choices. It’s easy to feel out of control!
But maybe we’re not supposed to be in control?! Truly, all we can do is pray and vote!
It’s so easy to be fearful, angry, critical, and judgmental. Jesus calls us to be peacemakers, not just peace-lovers! Jesus calls us to love our enemies! We are not to point out their flaws, or inconsistencies. Love covers a multitude of sins. Let’s lift up what is right; not point out what is wrong.
The Bible encourages us to meditate and focus on things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, good report, with virtue and anything that is praiseworthy.
Does this absolve us of our responsibility? Does that mean we don’t get involved in the process? Absolutely not!! We all need to vote.
We have done much more complaining and finger pointing than praying and loving! We’re called to love, pray for and bless those who accuse us, who revile us and who “disagree” with us! (Matthew 5:11)
No matter the outcome of our elections, when we wake Wednesday morning, the one thing we know for sure is that God is not worried or fearful about who’s going to be our next president. Psalm 2 tells us that the LORD actually laughs at the schemes and plots of kings, rulers and nations. He reminds us in Psalm 118 that, “It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in princes.”
So if you’re feeling anxious about what’s happening, or what’s going to happen, may we all lift up our eyes. May we fix our eyes on King Jesus!”
“Of the increase of HIS government and peace there will be no end…”
Isaiah 9:7
November 5, 2020-post election thoughts
And the aftermath of the election proved just as chaotic as the campaign itself. Keith weighed in on that.
“Please STOP!!!!
I’m sorry if that sounds harsh. I say that with kindness in my heart. But my friends…we don’t have to live according to the latest lead story, social media post, or television headline! Our emotions don’t have to stay on this rollercoaster ride, constantly rising and falling, twisting and turning with the “latest report.”
(Then Keith told a Bible story; or more specifically THE BIBLE story. As my husband says, Keith is a storyteller.I’ll summarize his thoughts here. )
In this Story, we read about a Kingdom that has no end. He tells us that this Kingdom is made up of righteousness, peace and joy! It’s a Kingdom of glorious beauty. It’s a Kingdom where our King is the King of all Kings and He rules and reigns forever. It’s a kingdom where He sits on His throne forever and ever! This Book tells us that if we’ll stop looking at what seems real, we can see this Kingdom…it’s among us. And yet, it’s coming!!!
My friends, PLEASE! Let’s stop looking at and listening to things that bring worry, fear, doubt, division and the worst in each of us. If we take as much time speaking with this King and reading His Book as we do with the lead stories, social media posts & TV headlines, we would be filled with a love that’s unconditional, even for our enemies. We would experience peace that goes far beyond our circumstances and understanding. And we would have a joy that we can’t even express because it’s “unspeakable and full of glory.”
“Our Father…may Your Kingdom come and Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven”
Matthew 6:10
photo by Dr. Aletha
November 7, 2020-“My side won!”
As we’ve awaited the outcome of the elections, I pray that you’ve been at peace. I don’t know if your side won or lost in the final outcome. I’m here to say that my side won! In fact, my side has never lost…it ALWAYS wins! But not because my ballot was counted for the candidate I voted for, or not… but because Jesus ALWAYS wins!
May we know that here is hope for this country…not because one candidate won and the other lost! There is hope because the Bible reminds us that, “The king’s heart is like a stream of water directed by the Lord; He guides it wherever He pleases.” In the past, God has used good kings and bad kings! He is ALWAYS going to accomplish His purposes!
Our world doesn’t need our gloating and celebrating, nor do they need our grumbling, accusations and finger pointing. May we walk as peacemakers…as sons and daughters of our King. May our identity be our humility, gentleness, brokenness and surrender as lovers and followers of Jesus! May we be people known by our love & compassion – for forgiveness, grace and understanding.
making allowance for each other’s faults because of our love; do not let unwholesome or worthless words to ever come out of our mouths, but only such speech that is good for building up others, according to the need of the moment and the occasion, so that it will be a blessing and give grace to those who hear.”
Paul, the Apostle who wrote much of the New Testament
A changed nation doesn’t begin in the Senate, on Capitol Hill or in the White House. It starts with humility, repentance, prayer, and seeking after God’s heart in God’s House!
November 16, 2020
“Will you allow me to dream for just a moment?”,Keith wrote
Can you imagine what our nation, what our world would look like…if only we would think, read, and meditate upon, advertise, proclaim and lift up Jesus with the same passion, intensity, fervor and dedication we have with our political ideas, opinions and resolutions about the elections?!!
Can you imagine what our world would look like if we walked in humility and gentleness with servant hearts?! Can you imagine if we loved, looked out for and preferred others above ourselves?!
What a world it would be if we would be “patient and kind”; “not envious or boastful”; not arrogant or rude”; not insisting on our own way”; and “not irritable or resentful”?!! (1 Corinthians 13)
How about simply starting with a smile and looking people in the eyes?! Dreams can come true!!! 😊”
there is something about a child…purity, love, innocence, trust, humility, simplicity and joy. Oh, that we might become as children!
Jan 7, 2021
After the events of January 6, 2021, the day Congress certified the election results and demonstrators stormed the Capitol building in Washington D.C., Keith wrote,
“Isn’t Jesus amazing?! ”
“Among His twelve disciples, he had one (Matthew the tax collector) who worked FOR the Roman government and one (Simon the Zealot) who worked for the overthrow of the Roman government! Can you imagine the conversations around the campfire?! The only thing that brought these two radically different people together was Jesus! Hmmm?! Maybe there’s a message here? 🙂‼️”
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God”
Matthew 4:9
Jan 17, 2021
Concerning the last days (weeks) and the days to come, many have asked me what I feel or sense. My life is in the hands of Jesus. I trust in His Word. I did, however, come across this verse as I read this morning. I think it’s pretty applicable….
“Do not say, ‘A conspiracy,’ concerning all that this people call a conspiracy, nor be afraid of their threats, nor be troubled. The Lord of hosts, Him you shall hallow; let Him be your fear, and let Him be your dread. He will be a sanctuary….” Isaiah 8:12-14
Isaiah 8:12-14
In a time when there seems to be much uncertainty and fear, may we remember that the Lord of Hosts is truly our sanctuary!
I’ve told you in a previous post that Keith survived a bout of COVID in March of 2021, but just a few months later he was traveling and walking- overseas again. Toward the end of the year he celebrated his 60th birthday; here’s how he feels about that.
Sept 6, 2021- Keith Wheeler’s birthday
Today, by the amazing grace of God, I turn 60! WOW! Who would have ever thought I would still be around?
“I don’t know what the future holds, but I know Who holds the future…” I don’t know who to give credit to for this quote, but I love it and it’s so appropriate for this next decade…🤠
“For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain. But if I live on in the flesh, this will mean fruit from my labor; yet what I shall choose I cannot tell. For I am hard-pressed between the two, having a desire to depart and be with Christ, which is far better.” Philippians 1:21-23
Today, I get to celebrate God’s gift of life to me, by walking with Jesus. It’s been a beautiful weekend of being celebrated by my fairytale princess (his name for his wife Nicole) and family. Today I have the privilege and honor of walking & celebrating together with Jesus!
“May I never take one moment for granted. Each step, each second, each breath, each heartbeat… May it be all for You, Jesus! You are the worthy One!”
exploring the HEART of faith, hope, and love
Has Keith’s perspective given you new insights about events of the past two years? I encourage you to follow him on social media where you can regularly read his posts about his travels and his thoughtful commentary about scripture, world events, life, and faith. Start at his website, Keith Wheeler Ministries.
I’d love for you to follow this blog. I share information and inspiration to help you transform challenges into opportunities for learning and growth.
Add your name to the subscribe box to be notified of new posts by email. Click the link to read the post and browse other content. It’s that simple. No spam.
I enjoy seeing who is new to Watercress Words. When you subscribe, I will visit your blog or website. Thanks and see you next time.
watercress words by Dr Aletha 